Posted December 1, 2013 by in Dating

How to Maximize Your Single Season

If you’re single and wondering how you can be the best you as you wait on God to send your special someone, then here is the key: Maximize the Moment. Check out my article on singleness by clicking here and read on to learn a few things practical things that you can incorporate into your life to make the most of your single season:

1) Work on you. While you shouldn’t feel that something is wrong with you because you are not married, you can use the single season to identify some areas of personal growth and concentrate on developing into the best possible you. This process can help you to evolve and learn more about yourself as you prepare for marriage. An easy way to start this process is to go to the store, spend a buck and pick up a journal. You can jot down three things you’ve been putting off…..but that you know you need to work on. You could maybe write down one or two areas of your character or personality that you want to finesse. And you could also hone in on one of your dreams that you’ve neglected. Then use this information to put a plan of action into place to work on these things.

2) Get involved in public service. Okay, fine….you don’t want to go feed orphans overseas….but that still doesn’t mean that you can’t be of service to others. There are a ton of things that you can do right in your own community that will be impactful. During the single season, serving others can be a tangible way to remind you that what you do for others matters. This is the same perspective necessary for a healthy marriage. So, as you help someone in need and minister to those who God has uniquely and divinely assigned you to, remember that you are developing a perspective that will be useful in marriage.

3) Treat Yourself. Find ways to remind yourself – daily– that you are special and valued. You can pick a random day of the week and order yourself a little something that will make you smile. Treat yourself to coffee or allow yourself to splurge on a new restaurant you’ve wanted to try every once in a while. Take time to reflect on all the great things about you because it’s important to just incorporate regular reminders to appreciate yourself.

4) Travel. At this point, you only have to pay for one plane ticket, one person’s meals, one set of luggage fees, etc. You have the freedom to go where you please, so use this season to see the sights and enjoy travel. Go skiing in Vail; make your way to the beaches of Mexico or plan a small weekend trip to a nearby city. Being single presents a unique opportunity to travel, explore and see the sights, so take advantage of it.

5) Establish Accountability. Decide what kind of relationship you want and focus on the boundaries you will need to put in place to get it. Resolve to invite a small circle of trusted family members and friends into your relationship to help you reach those relationship goals. This might require you to get involved in a ministry that will support you and be a source of encouragement in your life. Or this could require you to identify a couple whose relationship you admire and ask them to hold you accountable. Similarly, it might require you to ask a trusted friend to pray with you to help you maintain your purity during your singleness. These circle of friends, family and community of supporters can eventually help you evaluate potential mates and work towards the relationship that you want.

6) Prepare yourself for marriage. You can’t decide that when you get married, you will just “learn on the job” and everything will magically fall into place. While you are single, you have an opportunity to develop yourself so that you can enter marriage better equipped to successfully handle it. So, if you aren’t ready to lead a family, practice leading in a church ministry. If you can’t cook – grab a cookbook and start practicing. If your credit history is jacked – use this time to repair it so that you can have a healthy financial foundation. If your house looks like a mess, get in the habit of regularly cleaning and straightening up. Prepare now, so that you can be ready later.

7) Build upon your current relationships. Being single gives you unlimited access to family, friends, co-workers, and acquaintances without the demands of a family. So, use this time to cultivate those relationships and build bonds with those who are currently in your life. Focus on pouring into the lives that you value and carve out time to strengthen those relationships. This will not only feed your soul now, but also create a strong foundation for a community of supporters whenever your transition into marriage.

I hope that these tips will encourage you to maximize your single season. I want to hear from you – What have I missed in my list? What else can help people to maximize their season? Please comment below.

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